Lack of Color Chapter 21 Teaser

I watched Bella intently as we ate in silence and I tried to weigh all my options regarding her previous question. At the heart of it, it was a simple choice: either I wanted to be with Bella again or I didn’t. I took a sip of my drink and looked at her from the corner of my eye, watching as she licked some peanut butter from her bottom lip.

She had been through a lot of shit in the past few years, but the crux of it all was that I couldn’t help but think that she was still the same girl I was madly in love with for a few short months. She seared herself into my heart on the very first day I met her, and if I am being honest with myself, I’ve never truly let go of her. I tried, oh how I had tried to move on, but I had never truly let myself be with anyone else again.

Bella was it for me, I knew that, but I also couldn’t help that niggling voice in the back of my head reminding me how completely she had broken me. Between the loss of our baby, her father and her appalling behavior with Peter, I wasn’t sure I could move past everything. I didn’t know how.
“Are you alright?” Bella asked, as she finished her toast and put her crumb-filled plate on the coffee table.

“You seem tense."

“Yeah... just thinking.”

“About?”

“Everything really."
 
 
** I promise this is with pre-readers and I am hoping to get it posted soon. However, RL has shit all over me lately (my kid is pretty sick and I have a trade-show this week for work.) The next chapter may take a little bit before I post**

Lack of Color Chapter 18 Teaser

I'd like to say I'm turning over a new leaf and really want to post teasers more often, either here or on the Fictionators, but I'm slack. Let's face it. I'll post when I remember, but I will try and keep the chapters coming as often as possible. Like this next one... it should post by Friday:

Regardless of the fallout currently happening with Edward and me, I would have kept him or her and raised them. I would have loved that child more than anything in the world. My hand wrapped around my stomach, as I was apt to do these days, and stared outside at the snow that was falling softly in the early night.

My mother was hovering close by in the kitchen, drinking a tea while talking to her husband about arrangements for Charlie’s funeral, which was going to be held in two days. The hospital had called her when I was unconscious because she was listed as my emergency contact, following my dad of course.

I hadn’t been pleased when I saw her walk into my hospital room two days after my father had passed. She barked out orders to the nurses and insisted on seeing my doctor immediately, before she even came close to me to offer any sort of consolation. In fact, she skipped completely over the fact that I had been pregnant and acted like I was just sick or depressed because of my father’s passing. Even as I glanced into the kitchen and saw her smiling as she spoke to Marcus, I loathed her for acting like coming to Forks was a pain in the ass for her and my pregnancy was a blemish to her perfect little life.

“Isabella, would you like any dinner?” Renee called out from the kitchen as I heard her going through the cupboards. “There’s not much here, but I could probably get together some soup, or we could call out to that little Chinese place in town you always liked.” Renee finished by coming into the room and stroking my hair softly, which caused me to cringe.

“They closed down China Star two months after you left Dad.”

“Oh… well that was a shame. I always enjoyed their food,” she said simply. “I can always run down to the grocery store I suppose. It’s still open this late, right?”

“I’m not hungry.”